hit and run...

Firstly, sorry I haven't posted for a few days - I try to do it at least every other day, but sometimes things get busy. Not like anyone is reading this yet!  But I will try to be more consistent.

Today I was at the playground and I encountered what I call a "hit and run" mom.  I was sitting on a bench, nursing my son and there was another mom pushing her twins on a nearby swing.  Hit and run mom came over to the swing and pushed her child for about five minutes, during which the following remarks came out of her mouth:
"daycare?  I would never put my child in daycare.  I've been doing daycare my whole life."  (This said in response to nothing.)
To the mom of the twins "How old are they?  5 months?"  Reply - "They are 7 and a half." "wow - they sure are small"
To me "Is that a boy or a girl?"  "A boy." "You would never know in those pants and that shirt.  You dress him like a girl." (I was to surprised to answer, but in retrospect I wish I had said, yes, we are hoping he turns out to be a cross dresser.)
Her next remark "how old is he?"  By this point he had finished nursing and was scooting around the floor.
"9 months?  I guess he is just slow with his physical development."

By now I was almost laughing at her.  When this type of judgmental bullshit comes up, usually people are much more subtle.  After her barrage of insults ended, she immediately took her child and left the playground.  Who comes to the playground for five minutes, does this type of crap and leaves?  A hit and run mom.

It is natural to compare your child to other children.  It even is usual to say, "gee, their child is further along in _________", or to say "my child is so far ahead of them with ______." TO YOURSELF!  But out loud, this is some mean-spirited, crazy, rude shit.  Besides that, parenting is a tough job.  You have to respect your own decisions and your child's own pace of development.  Which means not judging other people's children and decisions.  Try supporting the other moms around you instead of trying to knock them down.  Come on.  How old are we?

Hopefully you will not encounter this type of crazy mom, but I think laughter is the best weapon against them.  If you have, post a comment about your experience.  

All the best 'til next time!

some thoughts about changing tables...

Having a baby is a life changing experience, for sure.  But only for you - not the rest of the world.  So I certainly don't think everyplace should suddenly have a changing table now that I have a baby.  That said, I do think places that have families as their key demographic or their target audience should have a changing table.

Speaking to the owners of these places:

Doing a quick google image search, I was able to find lots of different pictures of changing tables that can match various decor. They don't have to be big bulky white plastic things. (see picture on the left.) These are by far the most common, but there are also sleek metal ones, like the ones below.  If you think there isn't room, you can use one that drops down over the toilet - if they can have them in airplane bathrooms, chances are it will fit in your place.*

Do the right thing.  Help a momma out.

Sleek and shiny - ooooh!

folding ones fit most anywhere...

* Virgin America has changing tables on every flight - United only on international flights.

Puerto Alegra

We went there last night with two dear friends of ours who are expecting, so I thought it would be a good first review, fitting with the theme and all.  it was also nice because there was a group watching the giants game and every time they scored they cheered, so we could enjoy our dinner and still know the score as the Giants took 1st place in our division.

Yelp! said the place was child-friendly, but that's just a box you check on their site.  I could and maybe will put these reviews on Yelp!, but here they will all be in the same place, eventually.  Anyway, here I can talk about other stuff besides the restaurant, like how weird it is to be dining with a mix of hipsters, homeless folk and roving mariachi players looking at your child.  And other cool interesting stuff I will think of the next time, when I am less tired and more familiar with how English works.

The hostess was really warm to us as was all the staff and they sat us in the window - a place where we could put the stroller and not block anyone else.  It was supper loud there so you could say a crying baby would bother anyone.  The only real down side is that they have no changing tables, so you have to change the baby on your lap - thankfully it was just a wet diaper - and people were knocking to come in, as it takes a while to change a diaper anyway, even when you have the right equipment.  My husband can change a diaper in two minutes in a bucket seat of a car, but he has mad skills.  It takes me a while.

Summation:
Pros: Nice staff, enough ambient noise, no attitude
Cons: needs a changing table

hello...

This is your San Francisco momma here... I've been awake too many times in the middle of the night not to start a blog.  But why should you read it?  Not only for the fascinating things that I think about and happen to me, but also because I will tell you about "child friendly" San Francisco.  Not only the places that say they are child friendly but the real deal - do they have changing tables?  will the wait staff growl at you?       are they surprisingly accommodating even though families are not their main focus?

As an accidental stay at home mom, (more on that story later) I am learning the ropes and will share what I've learned with you.  One of those things is that you must get out of the house!!!  So pack your diaper bag   - we are heading for adventure!